Here We Come Bangkok Uh Oh!
by GACfan4Life
Summary: Harper's brother Stu is getting married in Thailand and she couldn't be anymore happy for him. But there's a couple of problems...One, Stu's fiancè's father doesn't approve of the marriage...And two, Alan is coming along. What will happen to Harper and guys? And will the wedding ceremony still go on? Phil/OC
1. Chapter 1

"Hi, you've reached the office of Dr. Stuart Price. Please note the office will be closed until the 24th. If this is an emergency, please try-"

"Hi! This is Dr. Stu Price. I'm getting married. So I'll be out of the country for 2 weeks. I'm not sure if I'll have cell service. If this is a dental emergency-"

"Nothing."

Lauren sat down, across from her parents who were speaking in Thai. "Daddy please, you're not helping."

"I looked into his eyes. Not the eyes of a man. The eyes of a coward." Lauren's dad spoke in English to his daughter.

Her parents started talking in their native language again as Tracy excused herself from the situation to answer her phone.

"Phil."

"Tracy. I'm sorry."

"Where. The. Hell. Are. You?"

"It happened again!"

"Don't say that, please."

"No this time we really fucked up."

"Seriously. What is wrong with you four?"

"So much Trace, I don't even know where to begin."

"Oh God. How bad? Like, no wedding bad?"

"Yeah...a little worse then that."

One Week Earlier

It was summer break and Harper was driving Phil to her brother's dentist office, listening to him rant.

"Can't you talk him into not going to Thailand for the wedding? I mean it's so far. It costs a lot. And we'll be jet-lagged. Hell, Lauren's father doesn't even like him which makes it even more awkward."

Harper sighed. "I'll give you the awkward part but Phil, it was their decision to get married over there, not ours. Be happy for my brother for once and Lauren." She finished as she came to a stop in front of the office door.

Phil grumbled incoherent words at his wife then looked at her. "You're not coming in?"

Harper shook her head. "No. I've got to pick Aiden and Rachel up from your mom's. Then I'll be back." She leaned over and kissed him. "You're a big boy Phil, you don't need to hold my hand while you get your teeth cleaned and checked out."

He growled at her. "You're going to regret saying those words."

"Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You say that all the time but never do anything. Now go, I've got to go get the kids."

Phil gave Harper a long breathtaking kiss before climbing out of the car. When she saw him go inside the building she pulled away and headed to her in-law's house to pick up the kids. The whole drive to the in-law's, Phil was blowing her phone up with texts, complaining about having to get his teeth checked out and complaining about how the wedding was in Thailand. Pulling into the driveway, Harper put her phone on silent before getting out to get the kids. After a while she strapped their two year old son Aiden into the car. Aiden was conceived during the Las Vegas trip that nobody will ever forget. And Rachel was conceived on Phil and Harper's real honeymoon, Rachel was four months now. After getting the kids strapped in Harper went back to her brother's dentist office to pick Phil up. When she pulled up to the building she saw Phil standing outside, waiting on her. Once he got in he let out a long sigh and sat back relieved.

"Finally that torture is over."

"Dad!"

Phil turned in the passenger seat and smiled at the beautiful children that he helped create. "There's my little man and princess. Have fun at grandma and grandpa's?"

"Yes."

"That's good." Phil ruffled the little boys hair before turning back around.

Harper pulled away from Stu's office and headed home. "How was your check-up?"

"Said I needed to floss more. Other then that, perfect."

"I don't think very many people use floss nowadays. How much did you badger my brother?"

"Not too much. I couldn't, not with all those tools in my mouth."

Harper chuckled as she pulled into their driveway. Killing the engine she looked over to Phil.

"So, what do you want for dinner?"

"Doesn't matter to me. As long as I can get dessert tonight." Phil smirked which caused Harper to roll her eyes.

"Then you have to put the kids to bed."

"Deal. By the way, you going to Ihop for Stu's bachelor lunch thing?"

"Hadn't planned on it. Why?" She asked getting out of the car.

"Just wanted to know." He said getting out to then put on a smile. "How about tomorrow I take Rachel with me and Aiden can hang out with you? Bonding time. Mother and son. Father and daughter." Phil stated, getting the kids out of the car and headed to the house with Harper.

She chuckled. "Phil, they were in me for nine months, I've bonded with them. But that sounds like a good idea." Harper opened the door and the family went inside.

Once inside their home, Harper went into the kitchen to start dinner. She made the easiest thing, spaghetti. While she cooked Phil played with Aiden and watched over Rachel. When the food was done, they all ate, then had family time together before the kids had to go to bed. While Phil put the two little munchkins to bed, Harper brushed her teeth, got into something comfortable and crawled into bed. It wasn't long until Phil came into the bedroom, closing the door, stripping down and crawling into bed.

"Miss me?" He asked, pinning Harper under him.

"I don't know. What happens if I say no?" She smirked.

"Then you'd be lying and I'd have to punish you." Phil stated, landing a heated kiss against her lips.

That night the two of them mingled passionately, all the while trying to keep quiet so the kids wouldn't wake up.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning Harper got up to feed Rachel and make breakfast for herself and Aiden. By the time Phil got up, it would be almost time for his brunch date with her brother. After Rachel was done eating, Harper put the four month old into the jumper so she could go make breakfast. When breakfast was done she set a plate in front of Aiden and herself, Aiden dug in right when Phil entered the kitchen to get a cup of coffee.

"Morning sleeping beauty." Harper said with amusement.

"Morning." He took a sip of coffee, looking from Harper to Aiden then back again. "Where's my food?"

"You don't get any. You have a brunch date with my brother, remember?" She chuckled at his sad face. "You're a big boy, you can wait for food for a bit longer."

Phil's phone went off a few seconds later and Harper laughed softly. "There's Stu. Wondering if your up and on your way."

Phil hit the 'Fuck you' button on his phone as he walked to the table. "Better get going before he starts blowing my phone up." He leaned down, kissing the top of Harper's head then Aiden's head. "You be good for mom and make sure she doesn't get into trouble." Before Phil walked away from the table, he snatched a piece of bacon off of Harper's plate and headed to Rachel.

Harper just shook her head when Phil stole a piece of her bacon. "The diaper bag's already ready." She called out.

She got a muffled response to her statement since Phil was eating the piece of bacon and putting Rachel into the carrier.

"I'll be back soon." Phil said from over his shoulder before heading out the door.

Once Phil was gone, Harper and Aiden finished their food. While she rinsed the dishes Aiden came back into the kitchen with a movie. He tugged on his mommy's shirt to get her attention. Harper looked down at her son with a smile as she dried her hands off and picked him up.

"You want to watch Cars while daddy's away?"

Aiden nodded. The two of them headed into the living room and Harper sat the child on the couch. She put the disc in the player then sat next to her baby boy. After all the commercials played, she hit the play button and the two of them got comfortable on the couch as they watched Disney's Cars. Aiden laughed and watched it intently until about halfway through then he fell asleep, using Harper's legs as a pillow. Harper ran her finger's through her boy's dark hair, his hair was going to end up being just like Phil's. She turned the player off and surf the channels to find something to watch. She finally stopped on an episode of 'Forensic Files' when the front door opened, revealing a sleeping Rachel and an irritated Phil.

"Your brother is a dick. Stu doesn't want to throw a Bachelor party. Ihop was the fucking party." Phil hissed quietly so the kids wouldn't wake up.

"You should've known he wasn't going to want a Bachelor party. Not after what happened at Doug's."

Phil let out a breath to try and calm himself down. "And I called my mom, she'll be here soon. We've got to go see Alan."

Harper looked at him with confusion. "Okay?...Why?"

"Somehow he got word that your brother was getting married and he wasn't invited. So now Alan's being a fucking crybaby."

"Phillip."

Phil and Harper's attention went to the front door to see Phil's mother.

"I better not hear that come out of your mouth again. Especially around the kids." Mrs. Wenneck scolded.

"Sorry."

Harper wiggled out from under Aiden and kissed the top of his head then smiled to Mrs. Wenneck. "We'll be back in a few."

"Take your time you two." She smiled.

Harper hugged her mother-in-law and Phil pecked the side of his mom's head before the two of them headed out the door to pay Alan a visit. Once they got to the Garner resident, the two of them let out a sigh of their own and saw Doug and Stu coming their way. Getting out of the car, Phil wrapped his arm around Harper's waist.

"Let's just get this over with."

The four of them headed up to the door and rang the doorbell. Sid or Mr. Garner answered it with a surprised look.

"Well I'll be. Glad you guys could show, Alan's been so out of it lately." Mr. Garner let them in and led them to Alan's room.

"Guys, I can't tell you how much this means...Alan's been waiting for the invite ever since he got word of the wedding."

"I'm sure he has." Stu said.

"Yeah. Been standing outside by the mailbox every day."

"Wow, that's tough." Phil stated.

"Poor guy." Harper said.

"Yeah. I uh, I'm not quite sure he ever left Vegas, you know? He really needs this." Mr. Garner finished then knocked on the door.

"What?" Alan's voice came through the other side.

"Sweetie, it's pa pa! You have visitors! Go in slowly, give him a chance to acclimate."

Soon the door opened up to a now happy Alan.

"Hey Alan." Doug said first.

"Hey guys. Hey Phil."

"Hey Bud." Phil faked a smile.

"Uh...uh, you guys wanna come in?"

"Sure." Doug said, entering first.

"Absolutely." Phil said, guiding Harper in then himself.

Alan hugged them as they entered then shut the door on his dad as he was in the middle of his sentence.

"Pretty cool room, Alan." Phil stated sarcastically.

"Thanks Phil. My dad pays the rent." Alan said excitedly, not catching the sarcasm.

Harper looked around at the mess. Clothes everywhere. Posters littering the walls and ceiling. Little action figures on shelves. Pill bottles on the nightstand.

"Alan, what the fuck?" Doug said going to the framed pictures. "We were supposed to delete these. You made a promise."

Harper gasped horrified at the pictures, she didn't want to remember the Vegas trip from two years ago.

"Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. What the hell?" Stu stated, pointing to the photos. "I'm not cool with this at all. You can't have these."

Phil laughed while Alan explained. "Chillax, Stu. Nobody ever comes in here."

"I can tell." Harper muttered.

"Total violation of trust." Stu said as Alan sat down to call his mom from the intercom.

Harper rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest as Mrs. Garner's voice came over the intercom. Her mind was screaming about how Alan was capable of taking his own food down to the kitchen, the spoiled brat.

"Can't believe you stopped by. This is really cool."

"Wait a second. Al, is that Mr. Chow?" Phil asked as he picked up an unframed photo.

"Yeah. We still keep in touch."

"Then why do you need us?" Harper muttered again.

Phil showed Stu the photo and Stu looked at Alan.

"Chow. The guy that kidnapped us?"

"He didn't kidnap us. He kidnapped Black Doug. Remember? It was a whole big misunderstanding. He's actually quite charming."

"Alan, he's a criminal."

Harper could feel Doug's pain as he massaged his nose in annoyance. Her attention went to the door that opened to reveal Mrs. Garner.

"Excuse me boys and Harper."

"Hi Mrs. Garner." Harper said politely.

"Hi, Linda."

"Hi Dougie."

"I guess we don't do dessert anymore. I didn't get that memo."

"Well, I'm sorry, darling. I'l be right back." Mrs. Garner said before leaving.

"Would a cupcake kill you?" Alan called after his mother.

Harper gritted her teeth, she was two seconds away from punching Alan square in the jaw for being a spoiled lazy fat ass. Phil looked over to Harper ans started rubbing her back soothingly.

"Calm down." He whispered in her ear.

"Ya know, I don't think this was a good idea."

"Uh, Alan, we have a little surprise for you. Stu would like to invite you to his wedding." Doug said, patting Harper's brother's shoulder.

"Well, only if you're not busy."

"Stu." Phil said.

"Well, maybe the Jonas Brothers are in town." Stu sassed.

"No. They're in Raleigh-Durham that weekend." Alan informed.

Harper just shook her head, Alan was officially creepy.

"Are you really being serious, Stu? You're inviting me?"

Stu hesitated for a moment before speaking. "Yeah, why not? Could be fun, right?"

"Phil, you going?"

"Of course. So is Harper." Phil said, tugging Harper closer to him.

"Then it will be fun." Alan said then opened his mini fridge, taking a syringe out and injecting something into his thigh.

"Whoa, what the fuck are you doing man?" Phil asked unbelievingly.

"It's my immunizations. This is the last day I can do it."

"That's supposed to be done by a registered nurse." Stu informed.

"I am a nurse. I'm just not registered." Alan said holding the empty syringe up.

Harper inwardly smacked herself, this guy was officially an idiot. Alan put it down and picked something else up.

"Oh, Stu, look at this." Alan put a toy chomping teeth on his table after winding it up. It had one tooth missing. "I bought this because I thought of you."

Harper groaned, this was going to be a very long and painful trip to Thailand.


	3. Chapter 3

After the trip to see Alan, Harper and Phil went home, made dinner, fed and bathed the kids, put them to bed, ranted about Alan then went to bed since their flight was the afternoon. When morning came, the two of them took Rachel and Aiden to Phil's parents' house then took a taxi to the airport. When they got there, the couple went through security, got their luggage tagged then met up with the gang.

"Hey, there he is!" Stu said happily, hugging Teddy, Lauren's little brother.

"Hey Stu."

"Teddy! What's up How are you?"

"It's good to see you man." Teddy greeted Stu.

"Alright."

"Who's this guy Stu?" Alan asked, taking off his sunglasses, staring intently at a Teddy like a guard dog.

"This is Teddy, Lauren's little brother. Goes to Stanford. Premed. This is my sister Harper, he husband Phil, Alan and Doug."

"Hey, nice to meet you man." Doug said shaking Teddy's hand.

"Glad I'm finally meting my little brother-in-law." Harper said, giving Teddy a hug.

"Wow, Stanford? How old are you?" Phil asked.

"I'm-"

"Uh, he's seventeen. Kind of a genius." Stu answered.

"Actually, I'm sixteen. I'm not a genius. My dad just had me take the entrance exams early." Teddy corrected.

"Because you're a genius."

"So what are you, a doctor?"

Harper rolled her eyes with a groan. "Here we go..." She said loud enough to only Phil could hear.

"No. Not yet. I'm premed."

"Ever heard of that guy Doogie Howser?"

"Yeah."

"Well, he turned out to be a gay."

"Who gives a fuck?" Harper said annoyedly.

"Alan." Doug scolded.

"It's true. I read it in 'Teen People'."

"Right. Okay, well I'm gonna grab a book or something for the plane. You guys want anything?"

"No thanks." Phil and Harper said.

"I'm good." Doug said.

"I would actually love a Smartwater." Stu said.

"Cool." Teddy said before taking off to get the items.

Once Teddy was out of earshot, Stu spoke. "What's the matter with you? He's sixteen."

"Yeah Alan. Take it easy." Phil said.

"Well I'm a little confused. Is he here just to see us off or what? How does this work?"

"How does what work?"

"Is that person coming to the wedding?"

"You've got to be kidding person is Lauren's little brother. If you didn't get the memo, Lauren is Stu's fiancè. Therefore Teddy's coming with us." Harper snapped. "I'm going to go sit before dumbass there asks something else unintelligent."

Harper crossed her arms and walked over to the sitting area and flopped down in one of the chairs. Soon after the rest of them sat down near Harper, Phil rubbed her back soothingly.

"Relax."

"Can't really do that when we have fucktard Alan coming along. A rock is smarter then him." Harper hissed lowly.

"Hey, mind if I sit?Teddy's voice rang out softly causing Harper to look up.

"Wolf pack only. Find another chair." Alan stated.

"There's no wolf pack Alan." Stu said.

"Alan! Move you fucking shit! Fucking dumbass." Harper spat out angrily, which caused the gang to jump a bit.

Stu moved it while Alan objected. "Careful that's Louis-" Stu tossed it to the floor. "That's a Louis Vuitton."

"Who fucking cares." Harper stated.

Phil pulled Harper onto his lap, pushing her hair to the side to leave small pecks across her neck. "Settle down Harper."

Harper looked over to see Alan had Teddy's neck roll then threw it across the airport before putting his headphones on. She tried getting off of her husband's lap but he held her tighter until she pinched him. Once she was free, Harper marched to Alan and swiped his headphones off.

"Hey!"

"Hey yourself you rude fatass." She said then snapped the headphones in half.

She took the cassette player and snapped the cassette holder off. "You best start acting nice or you can get your lazy spoiled ass up and head home. Stu invited you, he can univite you too." Before Harper walked away, she kicked Alan's precious Louis Vuitton bag then threw the headphones and cassette player in the trash.

Harper gave Teddy his neck roll back then sat next to Phil again, Alan gave her the teary puppy dog eyes. "That's not going to work. You're not Aiden or Rachel."

The rest of the wait was very quiet, when the intercom finally said that the flight to Thailand was now boarding everyone let out their own relieved sigh. Once on the plane, they sat on fastened their seat belts. After going through the basic procedures the plane finally took off.

"I hate to say it and no offense Stu..."Harper said since her brother was sitting right behind her and Phil. "...but I'll be glad when the wedding's over and we can go back home. It was nice and peaceful not having Alan around."

Stu sighed, he knew his sister was right. "I hear you."

"I mean, I haven't been around him since Vegas and being around him again is really grinding my gears because of his stupidity." She stated matter of factly.

"I'm with you Harper, but don't you think that was kinda harsh earlier?" Phil asked.

"What? Breaking his things? No. I'm sure he'll have new ones as soon as we land back in the U.S. It was either breaking those things or slapping him repeatedly for being rude."

The flight attendant handed pillows to the passengers. Harper kept it in her lap while Phil put his behind his head.

"That's true. He would've been crying like a little bitch." Phil chuckled. "You have hell of a swing."

"Let's just hope everything goes as planned." Stu stated.

Harper laughed sarcastically. "Brother...when Alan is around, nothing goes as planned. He's so drug induced it's unbelievable. Pill bottles littering his room. Who knows what kinds of drugs in his mini fridge. He needs to be put in a mental institution."

Phil took Harper's pillow and rested it on his shoulder before pulling her close to him. "Let's try to get some sleep. We can't have the soon to be sister in law bitchy when the plane lands."

Harper shook her head before resting it against her husband's shoulder and her pillow. Harper blinked a few times when Phil entwined their left hands together affectionately. She found it kind of odd since he rarely done that but she wasn't complaining. Harper smiled, nuzzling her face into his neck with a contented sigh, closing her eyes slowly. She pecked his neck a few times then fell into a semi-comfortable and semi-peaceful sleep.


End file.
